Little man and I have always had a super close bond.
It's been just the 2 of us at home since day one. He's slept in my bed with me every night (that he's home) since day one. Other than work and school we're alone together about 98% of the time... leaving that other 2% for the times we spend with family and friends.
Lately I've noticed a problem.
It's been building for years... and I fully acknowledge that I am the reason for the problem.. I've allowed and at times even encouraged it.
Little man is becoming anti-social... in the sense of having ZERO desire to be around anyone.. other than his mom. This became very clear on Christmas day.
We always spend Christmas day with my mom's family at my grandma's house. There were about 50 of us there this year. Having Christmas for 50 people takes a lot of work, so as soon as we got there I started helping set things up and getting food made. Drew was not happy about this AT ALL. He brought a game with him to play... but wanted me to sit and play with him.. even though my cousins were there and ready to play... that's not what he wanted. Drew wanted Mom.. and kept following me around the house. After the gifts were opened he asked if we could leave. I couldn't understand why Drew wanted to leave when our whole family was there and everyone was spending time together and having a good day. Drew just wanted us to go home. So after an hour or so of him asking, I gave in. Once we got home (which is actually right next door to my grandma's) he was completely happy. He had mom's full attention and we played with his new toys and had Christmas dinner alone.
My little man is also becoming possessive of his mom. I cancelled my plans to attend two adult get-togethers this month because Drew didn't want me to go. He says I don't need to hang out with anyone but him. My aunt is having a New Years Eve party at her house... and Drew has no desire to go. He says we should just stay home. Any time I drop him off at his dad's house he asks what I'm going to do that night. If I say I might have dinner with friends or go to someones house, he asks if he can stay home with me. It's been over 3 months now since I've done anything with out Drew. Even on the nights when he is at his dad's I don't go out or have people over because I feel guilty.. and know that if I tell Drew he'll be upset.
I've created a bad situation.
Drew and I talked about this the other day and I let him know that it isn't good for either of us... and that we need to make some changes. I'm not exactly sure of how to go about doing it... but I'm going to do it.. one way or the other.
50 people can be very overwhelming to a little guy of his age. I can see his apprehension. If he isn't familiar with that type of scenario it can be scary. Heck - 50 people would scare me! [No offense]
ReplyDeleteYou are a good Momma, don't doubt it. It doesn't last forever, the clingy-ness, but be glad that he wants to be with you.
I can't figured out why you aren't on my blog roll...silly me. :) You go on, now!
Hugs to you.