Oh How I LOVE The Beach

I am a HUGE fan of the beach.
It is my absolute FAVORITE place to be. Favorite!!


I love love love SUMMER. And look forward to it all through Fall, Winter and Spring. 

Lately I've been feeling like yuck.... can't really explain it... just yuck. 

And I've decided that it's because I'm going through BEACH withdrawals. It's been WAY too long since my toes have been in the sand. My nose is aching for that salty sea air. I want to feel the sun literally burning my skin. 

I NEED THE BEACH!!! I NEED SUMMER!!

I just went through my planner and dedicated EVERY free Saturday & Sunday from June through August to the beach. 

There are 13 weekends from June through August. 

26 days. 

But with previous obligations... and "Drew Weekends" (He swears he hates the beach... ) and avoiding Holiday weekends (I don't do crowds).... I only came up with 17 days. 

17 trips to the beach over a 90 period. That is hardly enough. 

I can already tell I'll be using A LOT of my sick days and personal time at work to hit the beach. 

I know Spring just started.... but Summer, please hurry up and get here!!! 

Ms. Paranoid is COMPLETELY Unprepared

Last night, about 5 minutes before bed time, the power went out in our house. Drew was in the bathroom brushing his teeth and I was in my room plugging in my cell phone. 


At first I just thought, "oh great, what is Grandpa working on NOW.." (he's our landlord and lives a few houses over and has the tenancy to cause some electrical issues in my house).


I told Drew to finish up and come in the room. I started wandering around looking for the flashlight. Yes, THE flashlight. Our one and only flashlight. 


I'm going from room to room, opening drawers and cupboards, and yelling to Drew "hey Bubba, where's the red flashlight?" of course he has no idea. I finally remembered we have a little flashlight in the bathroom just above the toilet. (Drew uses it to find his way from my room to the bathroom at night). 


So I grab the little mini light and start searching for candles. Here's where I should mention that I'm really NOT a candle person.... but I remember seeing some of our Christmas candles (ya, Christmas, like 3 months ago... I know) out in the dining room, so I grab those and some matches & head to my room. 


Now Drew and I are sitting in my bed with 4 lit candles and a mini flashlight. Drew is not at all satisfied with this. He's asking me to get more candles and he still wants that red flashlight. I remembered that we had another mini flashlight up in my closet somewhere, so I did some digging and found it. And then I had to find some batteries to put in it... 


Then the drama begins. We start talking about WHAT IF... what if the power NEVER comes back on? What if everything in our fridge goes bad because the powers out too long? What will we have for breakfast? What if I was in the shower when the power went out? What if we were at a restaurant when the power went out?..... this went on for awhile. 


I remembered that the laptop had been charged so we could at least use that to entertain us for awhile till we fell asleep (we ALWAYS watch tv till we fall asleep). I went online & checked with our electric company to see what was going on. They didn't show any info at all, so I called my uncle (who also lives next door), and he said it looked like the whole street was out, and No, it wasn't something Grandpa did. 


So Drew and I spent the rest of our night watching Youtube videos and talking about how UNPREPARED we are for any type of emergency. 


I'm normally a very prepared person. I'm paranoid about EVERYTHING especially when it comes to Drew. But I guess my paranoia doesn't apply to power outages... or natural disasters. 


Not to self:
This weekend, stock up on:
Batteries
flashlights.. like 5
candles.. like 40
food... don't forget chocolate

This Weekend I Learned

This weekend I learned:


1. Drew's weak/sensitive stomach will lead to me cleaning vomit from 4 rooms in the house in under 3 minutes. 


2. My sister thinks I'm bipolar.
    I think my sister's bipolar.
    The fact the we both honestly believe this about each other kept us laughing for hours.


3. Drew talks ... A LOT. But only to me. When we are together he absolutely CAN NOT stay quiet for more than 60 seconds.


4. Cooking requires the use of dishes. Dishes do not clean themselves. 


5. There are some things on Youtube that just shouldn't exist. There are also some videos that will keep you entertained for hours.


6. My itty bitty kid who can explain scientific facts, play chess, name every player for the Miami Dolphins, and name a bunch of presidents, really is only 7... and itty bitty. Just because he talks like he's 10, doesn't mean he won't get scared.


7. Loving someone isn't enough. 


8. My son has no concept of money... unless it's his. 


9. I am BEYOND ready for summer. When I saw that it was supposed to be in the 80's this Thursday I started to shake. I started planning my excuse for calling in sick and heading straight to the beach.


10. When you are in a room of women who are discussing their weight loss achievements and goals, you will get dirty looks as you help yourself to another slice of cheesecake.

I Think I Want More For You In Life....

Friday evening Drew's dad and I ended up having one of our very rare and random phone conversations. 


We got one the subject or work and how he really wants to go back to school. He didn't want to talk about it because he said he realized it just wasn't going to happen. I told him that I hated hearing him talk like that because it didn't sound like the "old him" at all. He used to be fearless, determined, outgoing, so full of life and happy. I told him that I don't see these things in him anymore and it makes me sad. 


He said he agreed... and that I wasn't the only person who noticed these changes in him. His family is CONSTANTLY telling him that they miss the "old him".


Then he says, "well what about you? are you content?"


I said, "No, I'm happy. I'd hate to just be content."


To which he replied, "god, I just don't get you... I think I want more for you in life than you want for yourself."


I laughed. I couldn't help it. So many people question my life.. the way I live.. and the fact that I am HAPPY. 


I explained to him that I've made it a point to be happy, every day for the last 7 years. Every single day I focus my energy on making sure my son is healthy and happy. If Drew is healthy and happy... than I am happy. It sounds pretty simple to me. I have a purpose... a reason... I have my son.


He said, "Ya, but you don't enjoy your job, you have no hobbies, Drew's school and activities are expensive, you live alone, and you never really DO anything. Don't you want more?"


No... no I don't.


Ok, that's not completely true. I'd love a house on the beach.... 


But all in all, I'm happy. Not content... Happy!


I told him I appreciated his concern. It was nice to know that he even thought about these things.. and considered my happiness. But I also assured him that I was more than fine. 


I am a firm believer in "To Each Their Own".... and I also believe you should do everything you can to make yourself happy. 


Content... really? Who wants to just be content?

Randomness of the Week

1. I really do have the best of intentions when it comes to meal planning. However... I suck at it. The planning part is pretty easy.. it's the follow through and actually EATING the specified meals that I suck at. Maybe the planning part is only easy because I'm obviously doing it wrong.... 


2. Really wish I didn't start work until 8:30. I've been late every day this week because I'm just WAY too comfortable in bed to get up. 


3. Seeing that a parent OBVIOUSLY did 90% of their child's science project disgusts me. It's the kids assignment.. not yours!!


4. I LOVE traditions. Even the simplest ones. Every year my Aunt makes a traditional St. Patricks meal and invites us over. We're not even Irish, she just loves doing it. And I love knowing exactly where I'll be eating every March 17th.


5. Wood floors show WAY more dirt and dust than carpets do. I begged to have my wood floors put in. Now that I have to sweep & mop CONSTANTLY I am seriously regretting it.  *PS, Chihuahuas shed excessively!! 


6. I am BEYOND ready for summer. This cold spring weather is pitiful. I need constant sunshine, temperatures in the high 80's, and weekly trips to the beach!!! Hurry up Summer!!


7. I have a BAD habit of wanting something I can't (shouldn't) have, getting it (or having the opportunity of getting it), and then not wanting it any more. Never satisfied... story of my life. 


8. I need to win the lottery... badly. 


9. Having a dysfunctional (extended) family is exhausting. If we had our own reality show we'd be billionaires in days. 


10. This weekend Drew will be at his dad's. I have absolutely ZERO plans. There are things I can get done around the house and of course a trip to the store is needed, but I have 73 hours with ZERO obligations. 

More Reasons Why Drew's Teacher Hates Me

I couldn't care less about what goes on in OTHER classrooms. 
But when it comes to MY son's class, I care.... A LOT.


About a month or two ago, I had a meeting to voice my concerns with Drew's teacher. 
I let her know that when my 7 year old complains about the noise levels and constant disruption by his classmates, then we have a problem. She informed me of her how she "handles" this behavior.. basically she doesn't. She had a list of reasons, one of which: " kids will be kids.. they're still learning". By the end of the meeting she agreed to make some adjustments to correct this problem. So far Drew says things have gotten better. 


Then this week we encountered a couple more issues. 


At the end of January the kids were sent home with information about their up coming science projects. The proposed project outline was due a week later. The actual project wasn't going to be due until March 17th. A month and half worth of time to complete a science project. 


On Monday of this week when I went to pick up Drew, his teacher mentioned that they would have very little homework this week due to Thursday being the due date for science projects. This immediately irritated me... but I decided to wait and discuss it with her at our next meeting.
But later that night over dinner the discussion came up between Drew and I. He asked me why they had so little homework just because of science projects. He said "does she think people really waited till this last week to work on their projects? That would be crazy." I told Drew I completely agreed with him, but that yes, she must have assumed most kids wouldn't have started working on them earlier and would need time this week to get them done. 


Drew also mentioned that night how he hates that when some kids don't bring in certain things their asked to for a project, that the rest of the class has to miss out on doing it until everyone brings their stuff in. I again told him that I agreed with him and felt it was unfair to the students who paid attention and did what they were asked. I reminded him of the time a couple weeks ago where we didn't bring in a shoe box like we were supposed to. I would have hated for Drew to miss out on the project, but I would have completely understood that it was our own fault. 


Yesterday when I picked Drew up, Drew asked her about a project that they again failed to do. She told him to just leave his supplies in his desk and they would get to it when they could. I was irritated once again so I decided the conversation couldn't wait. I handed Drew his basketball clothes so he could go change while we talked. 


I explained to her my feelings about their project delays. Her response: "well life happens, and we need to just learn to accommodate others. Some times things come up and these kids shouldn't be penalized for it." So I said, "oh ok, so you prefer to penalize the children that did what they were asked? I don't understand that one bit." I also mentioned my issue with the lack of homework this week. This time she says: "well honestly, you're right. However not every parent handles their child's homework the way you do. I would hate to see Thursday come and have very few projects turned in."


I let her know that due to the time restraint of having to get Drew to his game, I couldn't finish our conversation right then, but that I was looking forward to our next meeting. 


I really don't know what to do about all this anymore. For a ton of reasons we're practically stuck at this school. It's an independent private school.. and to make matters worse, his teacher is also the principal there. 


My desire to home-school Drew grows every day... I just wish the number in my bank account grew right along with it. 

With The Help of the Dolphins.. Kinda

My little Drew is not a fan of sleeping in his own room in his own bed. This event has only happened about 3 times in his entire 7 year old life. 


I am also not a fan of him sleeping in his own room in his own bed. He belongs in my room in OUR bed. 


However.... 
Recently his middle of the night somersaults have gotten completely out of hand. Neither of us is getting much sleep, and that is totally unacceptable. Sleep is a HUGE necessity in my life. 


So I decided it was time. Like it or not, that kid needed to be in his own bed.
Last night after his shower I announced he would be sleeping in his own bed that night. After all, wasn't that the reason I bought him his Miami Dolphins comforter? 
The tears started. He flat out refused. 


So the dogs and I piled into his bed with him. I told Drew I would lay with him until he fell asleep, then I was out of there, but he could keep the dogs. His reply, "we'll see about that..." 5 minutes later he was asleep. (Thank you basketball practice for wearing him out!)

At 8:23 I was in my own bed.. all alone. I was not happy. Just like Drew needs to cuddle with me to fall asleep... I need him to cuddle with before I can fall asleep! In the past I've gone into his room and picked his sleeping body up and gently placed him into my bed at this point.... but not this time. (This time I just went in and snuck some pictures.) Eventually I must have fallen asleep... alone.


Until about 2:00am when Drew got up to use the restroom... and I discovered I wasn't actually alone. The dogs were both on top of my bed and barking at Drew. When Drew finished in the restroom, he climbed right into MY bed. 


But at 2 in the morning I couldn't care less. All I cared about at that moment was getting back to sleep. 

So he may not have slept the WHOLE night in his bed... but at least he started out there. 

Baby steps... 

Maybe once his Miami Dolphins sheets and pillows come in, it'll do the trick! Here's to hoping.... 

Mr. Antisocial

Some think my little man has an attitude (I agree... but not when it comes to this). Some think he's rude. Other's use the word "Antisocial".


Call it what you will.. but here are the facts:


-Drew is not a fan of people. With the exception of: Me, his cousin Justin, and his dad. 
-Drew will ignore someone if he has no desire to hear what they say.. no matter who it is.
-Drew will not say hello or even acknowledge your presence in a room unless you are one of the "privileged" 3 people. 
-Drew has zero desire to play with most kids under the age of 10. Unless you have a full understanding of chess, can carry on a conversation about the NFL or MLB, or can list at least 10 Michael Jackson songs, Drew will probably not speak to you. 


I'm really not sure which, if any, label really applies to my son. But antisocial does sound about right. 


A few recent examples of this:


-While at the home of some of our friends, Drew ignored their 6 year old daughter as she sat right next to him asking if he wanted to play on the computer with her. The mother of the girl stopped the conversation we were having to tell Drew he was being rude and to stop ignoring her daughter. Drew didn't even look at the mother.. or the daughter.  (I addressed this with him right away... he was beyond rude!)


-When we arrived at my nephews baseball game the only person Drew addressed was his oldest cousin, Justin. Didn't even say hi to my sister or her stepdaughter. And when my mom arrived... nothing. 


-We had friends over to our house to visit. Drew sat right next to me the whole time and refused to play with their children. 


I'm having a little dilemma with all of this. I fully acknowledge that some of Drew's behavior is just plain RUDE. Regardless of who he LIKES, he still needs to be polite and respectful. But... I admit, this is how I raised him.
When Drew was a baby and didn't want to go with someone who wanted to hold him, I wouldn't make him. Ever. When he got a little older and we went somewhere, I never made him speak to anyone, even just acknowledging them with a "Hello". I didn't want to force Drew to do anything. I've always said that school & the doctor are the only times he'll never have a choice. But for everything else, I wanted him to choose. I didn't see it necessary for him to say hi to someone he had no desire to speak to... even if it was his grandmother. 


I'm ok with my son being antisocial. I don't really like people either. But I am not ok with him being rude. Being perceived as rude is one thing... and we couldn't care less about what anyone else thinks.. but actually being rude, is just unacceptable. 


It's a work in progress. We discussed it a lot this weekend. So now we'll see how it goes.

My Own Bestfriend

Right now there's something on my mind... and heart. It's been there for the past 7 1/2 years. It's a topic that I can analyze for hours on end... and often do.


And it's something that I only feel comfortable "discussing" with myself.


No, I don't just sit here and talk to myself... that's a little much for me. But I think about it... I analyze it.. my mind has these back and forth conversations.


I have a few select girl friends. I have friends that are really just the mom's of Drew's friends... I have friends I met during middle school and high school.. friends I used to work with. And there are certain things that I feel more comfortable talking to one of them about than the others, and vice versa. 


But this topic.. subject.. issue.... whatever it is... this one is all mine. I'm the only one who knows the WHOLE truth... well, my side of it.... I'm the only person that I'm willing to be 100% truthful with about it. 


I'm never really a big fan of other peoples thoughts, feelings or opinions when it comes to MY life. I admit, I may not have all the answer to even my own issues.... but I highly doubt anyone else does either. 


It's not a problem that has a solution. It's very open ended. I think this is another reason I keep this one to myself. This issue has opportunity, possibility, potential... both good, and bad.... 


So when it comes it this, I am my own best friend. I'll give myself my own advice. I'll listen to my own venting of the frustration. I won't figure it out.... I won't settle it... but I'll be there for myself... for my heart... 

Science Fair Frustration

The love of my life has his first science fair coming up. He's in 2nd grade so the schools expectations aren't too high... however, unfortunately for Drew, Mama expects a blue ribbon.


I happen to be the proud owner of a bright blue 1st place science fair winner from the 6th grade. Yep, I was a genius!.. sort of.


But we have a problem.. or actually I have a problem. Drew chose the simplest, easiest, BORIEST project ever! 


*I honestly get that this is HIS project and he should do whatever one he wants... and I've fully supported him and helped through the whole process... but it's MY blog and I'm venting... deal with it.


How much salt does it take to float an egg?


Seriously. 
I can't believe this was even a freakin' choice! My child is very into science stuff right now. He's saving his money to buy a kit that let's you build your own radio. He's a smart and talented boy. So why in the world did he pick this???


Because it was the first choice listed. 


Drew is a very determined and stubborn child (no clue where he gets that.... ). So as soon as he read it, he decided that's the one he wanted to do. Then proceed to read the other 2 pages of choices, and stayed focused on his first choice. 


Why can't we just make a volcano or something with electricity?


This week we'll be putting everything together for his display board and he'll be typing out his report. At this point I've decided that maybe if we make a super fancy display board that he'll win just because it looks cool.... even if the project is LAME... yes, I'm desperate. 


Worse case scenario, I'll be buying him his own blue ribbon. 


*And in the interest of being fair.... my 6th grade BLUE RIBBON WINNING science project? Which evaporates faster, salt water or tap water?


Yeah.... I know... but I got the freakin' ribbon!!

I'm Not A Girl.. Not Yet A Woman (or Mother)

This morning I realized that I have 3 months left until I turn 29..... 


29....


How in the world did that happen?? I'm not old enough to be 29!! That's WAY too close to 30... and 30 has always been the official "Grown up/Adult" age in my head. 


I started thinking about how in so many ways I'm still only 22... or maybe even 19 at times:


-Paying for health insurance and car insurance still baffles me on a monthly basis. Shouldn't my mom be handling all that? Don't even get me started on the fact that I have a 401k.


-I am scared to death of being home alone at night. My plug in air freshener doubles as a night light. 


-I still look at my son with pure confusion at times when he calls me MOM.... how in the world am I old enough to be someones mother?


-Recently someone asked me if I have a will. Excuse me? Only old people have wills. 


-My refrigerator contains 9 different beverages, cheese, eggs and butter. That is hardly the refrigerator of a grown up. 


-I still know which outfits to wear to the mechanic or Home Depot to get the best service and lowest price. 


And then there are the millions of reasons why I've got to be at least 40... or some other Grown Up age:


-There is a first aid kit, extra clothes, and food in our car at all times.... just in case. 


-My bills are all paid on time, if not earlier.


-8:00pm is bed time. 7:30 if get Drew into bed without seeing any of the clocks. 


-Routine and structure are HUGE in my house. 


-I have a 7 year old son!! 


-My planner consists of the dates of Drew's basketball games, doctors appointments, Tupperware parties, and when each bill is due. Not a single "date" listed... ever.


-The thought of going to Vegas for my cousins 21st birthday exhausts me. Alcohol, high heels, men, dancing.... and no bed time. Not even slightly imaginable. 


-There are band aids, cough drops, crayons, wipes, candy and small tools in my purse. 


So which one is it? Am I really a freakin' adult??? Or is it at all possible that I'm still a YOUNG woman? 
I guess as long as I'm still technically "in my 20's" I'll be ok.... but next year, I'm throwing in the towel.. and investing in a wheel chair.